hovercraft pirates when our wake hits your shore

Released: 12 April 2010 Label: True Blue Records

Fortunately, it doesn’t happen that often, but now and again an album comes along with virtually no positive or redeeming qualities. Hovercraft Pirates are fully paid up members of the not-so-elite group of acts to manage the feat.

Vaguely grungy, vaguely poppy, vaguely punky and distinctly garage rock in approach, there are many ingredients in the Hovercraft Pirates sound. Sadly, all they amount to is a big fat nothing.

Not one of the eleven songs is remotely memorable for anything other than being poorly arranged and averagely performed. If the Celtic-flavoured Marilyn Manson meets My Chemical Romance intro of opening track Look At Us Now sounds like a disaster on paper, then actually listening to it only confirms that thought.

Hovercraft Pirates would clearly love to be seen as some kind of trail-blazing alt.rock innovators, but the reality is that on tracks like Strangest Creatures they just sound like Papa Roach covering Limp Bizkit in some nu-metal nightmare. Hardly trail-blazing or innovative, or indeed, listenable.

Very occasionally, a half decent idea raises its head – the Police inspired melody and off-beat feel of Alma Perdida for instance – but quite honestly, it’s simply not worth sitting through the rest to get to these isolated moments.

In fairness, there will always be a market out there for bands like Hovercraft Pirates. Which just goes to show how misguided some people can be.

by Marcus Jervis